Friday, July 15, 2005

Harry Potter's Much Ballyhooed Half-Blood Prince Revealed

Yes, Harry Potter fans, just moments after the umpteenth HP book went on sale at midnight in London, 7:00 PM Eastern Time, 6 Central, 4 Pacific, the mystery revealed, right here on ABN - the identity of the mysterious "Half-Blood Prince."

Indeed, we here at ABN wrote about Le Petit Prince as recently as Wednesday.

Le Gran Prince with Machiavellian Might.

Yes, He Who Shall Remain Nameless As Long As Possible.

He Who Took the Oath to Uphold and Defend the Constitution.

He Paid on the Public Dime - and the Public Trillion Dollar Debtsky.

Yes, The Pious Prince, the Righteous Rogue, the Foiler, the Spoiler, the Grand Master Task Master Master Mind.

Yes, the Pale, Right Wing Dove of American Jihad.

Yes, friend and foe, the Enemy Who Is Us, the Emperor's Clothes, the Executive's Cloak.

The Ultra Supra Puppeteer, Minister of Bush-Brand Loyalists, Minister of Evangelical Evility.

Bush's Bespectacled Brain, He Who Pushes the Buttons.

The Machiavellian-Meister Behind the Curtain.

The Rovester, Karl with a K.

As in Das Kapital.

As in Mein Kampf.


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You heard it here first.

And we guarantee our results, our Revelation, hours in advance.

Get the book. Get off at Station 1600 1/2 Pennsylvania Avenue, and read between the lines. You'll see.

Voldemort is Peanuts compared to This Guy.

There in fiction and fact: the Ultimate West Wing Muggle.


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