Thursday, July 21, 2005

Not So Easy Rider


Seems as Le Tour winds down towards Paris and as hottern' heckster July winds on in Texas, I'm sort of winding down, too. Summer slump in the bottom of July. Gonna have to renew those meds and fast, eh? Looking all over for that bone of hope in my bod'ster, feeling maybe a smidgeon but not a bone. And backbone? Ho. Salvation from such a den (and din) of eniquity is a tall order, indeed.

For some reason, getting this cut loose idea of escaping on a rail, a road, a bus, or (a shocker to me, the cyclist) a roadworthy scooter (like a small, sleek motorcycle - a lifelong cyclist has daydreams of going motorized?), gleeming Route 66 style, Kerouac style, Easy Rider style, out getting sunburned, being blown by the wind, getting the hell off the domestic, homeland radar, Easy Rider Lite, as it were. Nothing illegal and not really "free" of course, not in any absolute sense, but as the saying goes, "anywhere but here." Like the guy said, "If I owned Texas and Hell, I'd rent out Texas and live in Hell."

Guess I've learned lately and yesterday, too, that I'm just not ready to have any sort of earnest, committed or even really close relationship with anyone these days.

I am pretty much down on the lot of the species, if not quite the whole. Really now, what has this human race done for me lately? Or to be less pissy, less Eeyore, what have the masses done for the common good lately? Sound better?

[Dear readers and friends, not to worry and not to take this too personally, if you please. It may be serious and personal to me, for now, but as for you, you are freely living your own lives - and see the post "Riding Easier" above.]

Oh, the irony (and some of the what confounds my friends) is that I laugh so much, cut up so much, carry on and stay engaged. And here at ABN, I'm all over the map BUT REALLY (truly) trying to voice an altuistic - if pained and contrarian - consciousness, and mostly, in return, I get grit in my teeth and sure signs in the headlines and in the headlights that too many people, in power or not, are like supposedly "sentient" wrecking balls. In an often vicious circle, full of bullying if not quite blind desires, the consumers are also the consumables.

I seem to get along best with those who are unpredictable, sarcastic, even bitingly snide about the human race. I'm a supposedly social animal who misses the magic of leading/being on group tours hither and yon and now just wants to be/get footloose again (even looser, cut looser) out on the open road. Need a fix. Gimme a line, uh, um... a ribbon of highway.

Maybe, though, I just need those refills and a line up of fun feasts with friends, always a fine elixir for what ails us all.

Ticket to ride?



Feeling my Va Gogh-ish, Walt Whitmanesque dark side, and it just goes to show that creativity REALLY IS close to AN edge, if not THE edge.

The L'ster


At 7/21/2005 10:20 PM, Anonymous bill said...

Well, this certainly gives us enough to talk about tomorrow. love, b

At 7/22/2005 9:10 AM, Anonymous Jack said...

Many years ago I attended a pubic lecture by Murray Gell-Mann, Noble Prize-winner and the discoverer/inventor/creator of the quark model. During the lecture Gell-Mann made the comment that, "The difference between a human being who understands quantum mechanics and a human being who doesn't is greater than the difference between an ordinary human being and an amoeba." At the time I thought that was one of the most outrageously arrogant comments I had ever heard, but as time has passed I've begun to believe that Gell-Mann was simply stating the non-politically correct truth. (N.B. Part of truly understanding quantum mechanics consists of realizing that it can't be understood in any warm and fuzzy, anthropocentric way, regardless of how "elegant" it might be.)

The only "salvation" for the human race at large lies in evolution, and anyone who truly understands evolution knows that that is a cold comfort.

Forget transcendence. Think timely extinction.

At 7/22/2005 9:29 AM, Anonymous rainlily said...

Get off the couch. Get out and breathe some real air, not reconstituted, recycled, “refreshed” through AC filter-in-a-box air, to clear the cobwebs. Get into some real sunlight for some insight. Quit rehashing the ills of humanity, you’re bound to be disappointed.

It’s theatre!

Me thinks you think too much – too much focus on your cerebral convolutions – like wandering in a maze of your own design, i.e. self-appointed guardian of the clear vision? Hell, it ain’t easy being a beacon.

What the bleep??? If you don’t like your reality, change it... I doubt that just a change of scenery will accomplish all that you find lacking in your current surrounds or relationships -- but glad you’re not relying on someone else as an emotional crutch. (Is your idea of a relationship based on a partner, a sounding-board, or just a cheerleader?) Sometimes I wonder if what you really seek is drama, hence you’re self-claimed role of stirring things up in other people’s lives.

“Perhaps like most other people, I have had to overcome a self-centered inclination to live on my own terms, sometimes obsessed with intense ambition... I’ve come to realize that .... It takes a lot of effort to sense and accommodate the desires of others in a generous way.” Jimmy Carter

Personally I put whatever “faith” I have in nature, not people. Humans change their minds too much, are hardly sincere/dependable, seldom truthful, and think the world revolves around their thinking (self-centered view of the world/truth).


At 7/22/2005 9:33 AM, Anonymous Colbster said...

Loving it - I know those sentiments well. Every day they haunt/stimulate
me. A few are able to live off of them (Hunter S Thompson comes to
mind) and still seem to find themselves at the wrong end of a gun barrel.

Yes there is a mad undercurrent to creativity that is hard to look away
from. But - I sometimes believe - there is an different creativity that comes from a place of gratefulness: that the world can be alienating and yet we have friends (not many, but some). The universe is cruel, and yet a plate of good Mexican food is the kindest of things. And life is short and youth
is shorter, but we are in fact, here.

Chicken soup for the soul? A little
bit perhaps, but there's good stuff out there still and damned if I'll ever understand how it's easier to see at some times than others. I have figured this much out for me: when you have a roof over your head, some money in the bank, and you're making daily steps toward some reasonable goal or other in a realistic time frame (painful, necessary surrender), suddenly the good stuff seems to be everywhere. Then you get dissatisfied with what you've got and have to learn the whole thing all over again!


At 7/22/2005 10:13 AM, Anonymous rainlily said...

I think there's a special category for talk-show hosts (i.e. Rush). It makes me wonder about snide comments: do they promote better understanding, better communication? Or are they a vent, a cattle prod where the readers' reactions are knee jerk defensive? So speaking truth to power should not enflame, nor should it incite more hate (either of ourselves or others). Speak to solving the dilemmas.


At 7/22/2005 4:28 PM, Blogger Lawrence said...

Well said and thanks to all here so far.

Rainlily, change your reality? Um, let's just say, easier said than done. Tried to wear a new paradigm lately? Ambitious stuff.

As for platforms for ranters, ravers, hacks and hounds of all sorts, that's the good thing about personal mail, e-mail and my blog - those ARE places to vent, to speak our minds, to let go, to not filter overly much, to be politically incorrect/uncorrect - and as we so well know, to make the private public.

But then of course, unless we're as witty as Michael Moore or as pedantically in synch with the neo ditto heads as Bill O'Reilly, it's generally true that the more public our platform and the bigger our audience, the more we have to model our comments and actions to an audience who, as long as they stick it out, keep deciding whether to accept or reject us.

To express ourselves freely, all we have to do is go for it. To grow an audience, we've got to offer up palatable morsels indeed - something either original or well-said or both.

Beyond Rush, I would say that Howard
Stern, Fox, polemical media outlets and almost ALL of talk radio are irresponsible - but, as it turns out, irresponsibility is a big part of freedom.

But as you know, I am just as interested in solutions, always happy to
promote the ones I think best - no matter how unlikely others and/or the
masses will accept and act on them.

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