Monday, June 13, 2005

Fed Up at Work?

Fed up at work?

Past ready to take a summer break?

High time to tell the boss or dumb ass Dilbert co-workers to shove it?

Well now there's a way to let off steam just by saying one of these rich lines as if you really mean it.

Yes, you've probably heard a few of these before, but how about another go round just for medicinal purposes right here in the middle of the June doldrums, eh?

Yes, friends, it's "Good Things To Say When You're Stressed At Work"*....


...

You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing?!


Well this day was a total waste of make-up.


Well aren't we a bloody ray of sunshine?


Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.


Do I look like a fucking people person?!


This isn't an office. It's HELL with fluorescent
lighting.


I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30
years.


Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.


I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.


Back off!! You're standing in my aura.


Don't worry. I forgot your name too.


Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.


Wait... I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.


Chaos, panic and disorder... my work here is done.


You look like shit. Is that the style now?


A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.


You are depriving some village of an idiot.


If assholes could fly, this place would be a fuckin'
airport.




And last but NOT least....



Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you!!!!!!



...


[*snatched with a kind word but without permission from the blog PeaCeFOol]

Cheers from all of us here at ABN, slaving away at our desks just for you.

2 Comments:

At 6/14/2005 5:38 AM, Anonymous rainlily said...

is there such a thing as cynical humor? Or is cynicism one of the humors (in the Greek sense)?

And can cynicism breed cynicism? If we use cynicism to get at the ludicrous elements of our lives, how to we get the truth and action? just asking questions.

 
At 6/14/2005 2:11 PM, Blogger heidi said...

Cynical humor?? NAAAAH! :) ;)

http://www.nationalcynical.com/words/depressed.html

Don't miss the testomonials at the bottom of the page... I'm DYING here!


"Burton's Anatomy of Melancholy" (1621) points to some of your other questions--

"An exact balance of the four primary humours makes the justly constituted man, and allows for the undisturbed production of the concoctions or processes of digestion and assimilation."

I think balance plays a key role in keeping the cynicism in check.

 

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